


A Real Boy

by imbeccacile



Category: Phineas and Ferb
Genre: AU, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-18
Updated: 2018-03-18
Packaged: 2019-04-04 07:53:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,017
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14015718
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imbeccacile/pseuds/imbeccacile
Summary: After reading about the differences between platypuses and humans, and seeing as making himself a platypus didn't work out, Doofenshmirtz decides to make a Human Inator. As per usual, the inator hits things that he doesn't intend them to hit.





	A Real Boy

Perry watched, unimpressed, as Heinz began his normal spiel.

He was strapped to a table at a diagonal, so that he could still see the scientist as he spoke. His wrists, ankles, and tail were all strapped down, though not tight enough to hurt. He could escape from this easily, but he had to be respectful and let Heinz finish, first. He also needed to know what exactly this inator did, so he could figure out some strategies to take it down. Though usually, he could just press a button, and it'd explode.

"Behold, the Human-Inator!" Heinz gestured to the large metal inator with a giant grin, breaking Perry out of his reverie. "I'm sure you're wondering, Perry the platypus, what this does," he began, being met with an exasperated look. "No? Really?" he looked surprised. "Well..." he walked over to the inator, shaking his head. "I'll explain it anyway. You see, Perry the platypus, I was thinking about old schemes. Remember when I turned myself into a platypus? To fight fire with fire, or in that case, platypus with platypus?" he paused, making sure Perry was understanding. "Aaanyway. I was thinking about why it didn't work, and then it hit me; what if I made _you_ into a human?"

Perry's eyes widened slightly. It actually made sense. He wouldn't be used to being in a human body. What if it was harder for him to fight like that? 

Heinz seemed to take pleasure in that response, clapping his hands together. It seemed he hadn't even thought about that. "Oh, this will be hilarious! I cannot wait to see what you look like as a human, Perry the platypus! Though I guess...I guess I will not be able to call you that anymore," he added, going over to the inator to press the button. It charged for a few seconds, and then a green beam of light engulfed Perry.

It was painful. Perry struggled against the bonds as his body grew and morphed. The pieces of metal tying down his limbs broke and he fell forward onto all fours, breathing hard. Slowly, he lifted a hand, blinking. It was a human's, all right. "Wow, Perry the platy- er...you look like a real man!" Heinz exclaimed, looking proud of himself. "How do you feel?"

Perry slowly got to his feet, looking down at himself. He was wearing a blue vest, rust orange pants, and his fedora, and he was...tall. He looked up, blinking. It was so strange to be eye-to-eye with Heinz like this. He opened his mouth to respond, but no sound came out. He shut his mouth and opted to shrug instead.

"Huh." Heinz frowned, tilting his head a little as he approached apprehensively. "I figured we'd be able to, y'know, communicate better. Oh well." He didn't seem too bothered by it. In their relationship, he was the one that did most of the talking, and he liked that. And as much as it annoyed Perry sometimes, it was for the best. He couldn't reveal too much about his personal life, that was for sure. "Alright then, Perry the human-pus. Come at me!"

Perry took a deep breath, cracking his neck, and ran at Heinz, both of them tumbling to the ground in a flurry of limbs. He got used to his new body rather quickly, except for when he forgot he didn't have a tail to attack with anymore. They were pretty much evenly matched. Just like they were the last time.

"Sir, it's muffin time!" Norm exclaimed happily as he entered the room with a tray of muffins. Distracted, Perry looked over his shoulder. Heinz took that opportunity to punch Perry, sending him flying backward into the inator, right into the button.

"Uh-oh," Heinz said, unnecessarily. Perry's eyes widened as the inator warmed up and shot a beam of green light at Norm. The tray dropped to the ground with a clatter as the robot's body shrunk, and kept shrinking. Nuts and bolts fell, and in Norm's place stood a child, around the age of Phineas and Ferb, wearing his signature dark blue suit and tie. He glanced down at himself, quiet for a moment, then began cheering.

"Whoa! Doctor D! I'm finally a real boy!"

"It's strange that he's a kid, isn't it, Perry the-wait, wait, wait, what are you-?"

During the confusion, Perry had switched the aim of the inator to himself, and reversed it. After a few seconds, he was a platypus again, and he jumped up to punch Heinz again. "Aw, c'mon!" Heinz cried as Perry tied him up, but he didn't fight it. "I _guess_ Norm's a kid because I just built him a few years ago..." he thought aloud, Norm still grinning ear to ear. Perry looked at him, a question plain in his eyes as he made his sound.

"No thank you, Perry the Platypus! I like this much better," he replied, picking up a muffin from the ground. With that, Perry shrugged and threw his hat, hitting the self-destruct button. With that, he saluted, still reeling from his own transformation and the robot's. 

"What's going on up he-" Vanessa cut herself off, still one earbud in her right ear as she entered the room. She looked first at her father, then Perry. Normal enough. Then down at Norm. Not normal. "Whoa, Norm...You're..."

"I'm human! And I can finally be your younger brother. You are the older sister I have always wanted!" Norm replied excitedly. Perry wondered silently how he could still sound like Norm, even from a kid's voice. It would take some getting used to.

Vanessa blinked. "Right," she replied, nodding once. "Alright then, _bro_. See you around, I guess." With that, she left. Perry had to give her credit for taking it so well.

"She called me 'bro'!" Norm cheered again.

Perry shook his head slightly, walking out to the balcony. "Curse you, Perry the Platypus!" Heinz called after him, though he sounded more exasperated than anything else. With that, he jumped off, hang-glider opening behind him.

What a day.  


End file.
